Breaking the Silence: Asking for Help is Hard
By: Michelle Madden, LPC, CADC II
In this line of work, courage is never in short supply — but when it comes to asking for help, even the bravest can hesitate. These are people who are wired to run toward the problem, to be the steady one in chaos, to hold it together no matter what. The idea of stepping back to take care of themselves often feels… wrong. Part of it is the culture. There’s a deeply ingrained belief that strength means pushing through pain — physical, emotional, or otherwise. Admitting that something is wrong can feel like you’re letting the team down. I’ve heard more than once, “If I can’t handle it, who will?” Then there’s the fear of what happens after. Many worry that if they admit to struggling with PTSD, depression, or substance use, it will follow them back to work. They fear losing the respect of their peers, being passed over for promotions, or being seen as “unreliable.” For some, there’s a real concern about being taken off duty altogether. That fear is enough to keep a lot of people silent until things are breaking apart.
Convincing this group to make themselves the priority takes time and trust. They’re used to being the helper, not the one helped. Often, it starts with reframing — helping them understand that taking care of themselves isn’t selfish, it’s necessary. If they’re not healthy, they can’t do the job the way they want to, and they can’t show up for the people who matter most at home. At GRIT, we’ve built our entire approach around breaking down these barriers. We don’t rush people into opening up. We meet them where they are, with peers who have worn the same uniform and understand the same unspoken rules. We normalize the conversation about mental health in a way that makes it less threatening and more like part of the job.
Treatment here uses a mix of evidence-based trauma therapy, physical wellness, and peer support. We use techniques like EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) to help process traumatic memories without having to relive every detail out loud. We integrate fitness, ice baths, and structured routines to rebuild both mental and physical resilience — because for this population, movement and discipline are familiar, grounding tools. Group work with fellow first responders and veterans creates a space where people can speak freely without fear of judgment, knowing everyone in the room “gets it.” Over time, something shifts. You start to see them realize that taking time for themselves isn’t weakness — it’s what makes them stronger. And when they return to work, they’re not just going back the same; they’re going back with a new set of tools, a clearer mind, and a better understanding of how to keep themselves healthy while still doing the job they love. For first responders and military personnel, the instinct will always be to run toward the call. At GRIT, we teach them that sometimes the call they need to answer first is their own..
Magnolia Meadows Residential Treatment Facility provides Treatment exclusive for First Responders & Veterans battling Trauma, Mental Health Conditions and Co-Occurring Disorders, creating a healing atmosphere for recovery, and instill a confident hope that better days are ahead.
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